The strength you build in your 30s is the body you’ll stand on in your 50s.

I was seventeen when I got my arthritis diagnosis. Seventeen. An age when most people are worrying about exams and what to wear on the weekend, and I was learning to plan my days around which joints would cooperate. I was hurting badly, and nothing seemed to relieve the pain.

The advice I got then was the same advice I would keep getting for the next two decades: swim. Swimming was safe. The water was the only place my body was allowed to move. I felt good underwater, but the pain was still there. Many days I would only kick instead of doing strokes because the pain in my hands and wrists was unbearable.

Even at my check-up a year ago, my rheumatologist told me the same thing: swim. By then I had already started lifting weights, and I knew that during perimenopause my body needed it more than ever, so I asked her to recommend a way to keep lifting. She told me to wear a wrist wrap and it helped greatly!

I began slowly, with 2-3 kg. I had hated the gym most of my life, so none of this was easy for me. At the beginning I only managed 1-2 times a week; today I lift 10-15 kg. It took me over a year and a half to train 3 times a week and 2 years to feel the emotional need to train. It calmed my mind, gave me confidence and lifted my spirits when I was down. Bottom line: lifting has not made me worse. It has made me stronger. My joint pain is lower than it has been in years.

The thing I was told my whole life to avoid turned out to be the thing that gave me my body and mind back.

I'm not telling you to ignore your doctor. I'm telling you to inform yourself. There isn't enough research on women's bodies; we need to learn to listen to our own body and be our best advocate. “Protect it by never loading it” is an old idea, and the research has moved on. So should the conversation.

For years the assumption was that a painful joint should be rested. But a systematic review and meta-analysis of 27 studies covering more than 1,700 people found that resistance training produced significant improvements in pain, strength, and function in knee and hip osteoarthritis. The American College of Rheumatology now includes strength training in its treatment guidelines for these conditions, as a recommended part of care.

The mechanism makes sense: muscle supports and stabilizes a joint. When the muscle around it is stronger, the joint carries less load and moves in a more controlled range. Strength doesn't grind your joints down. It builds the scaffolding that protects them.

That was my experience before I ever read the studies. The studies just told me why.

Do I wish someone had told me all of this at seventeen? Definitely! Will I get stuck with “why wasn't I told about this sooner?” Not at all! This is why I am an active evangelist of women's health. If you didn't have the information sooner, it's not too late.

If I did it with a severe joint deformation in my hands, so can you. Take it one step at a time and try not to be harsh on yourself when you're not up for it. It's ok. Trust the process.

We lose 3 to 5 percent of muscle mass per decade after 40 without strength training. Accelerated bone loss begins during perimenopause, and up to 1 in 4 women experience particularly rapid bone density loss, which sets up fracture risk for the rest of their lives. The estrogen that quietly protected your bones and muscles for decades declines by roughly 60 percent across the menopausal transition.

Yes, strength is a skill you build slowly, especially if you've never gone to the gym before turning 40, like me. If you wait until bone density is already gone, you are rebuilding in an emergency, in a body that has lost some of its hormonal support. Start earlier and you are laying down a foundation while the conditions are still in your favor.

Resistance training in premenopausal women builds bone mineral density at the spine and hip, with spine gains of around 2 to 3 percent over a year to eighteen months. More importantly, you are building the habit and the skill: learning to move well under load, knowing what proper form feels like, having muscle already on your frame.

The American Heart Association, the European Society of Cardiology, and the Menopause Society all recommend resistance training as a core part of healthy aging, with two sessions per week as the minimum the evidence supports.

I expected lifting to help me improve my hormonal health. I did not expect it to touch everything else.

My energy is steadier through the day. My sleep improved, which anyone who has lived with chronic pain knows is not a small thing. And there is something about doing hard things with your body, and watching yourself get measurably stronger week over week, that quietly rewrites how you talk to yourself.

You can't build muscle out of nothing. Two nutritional pieces matter enormously here, and most women aren't getting enough of either.

Protein. The muscle you're working to build and keep is made of protein, and requirements go up, not down, as we age. During perimenopause and menopause, experts recommend roughly 1.2 to 1.6 grams of protein per kilogram of body weight per day. In practical terms, a woman who weighs 70 kg (154 lbs) and lifts regularly is aiming for roughly 84 to 112 grams of protein a day. Those numbers surprise most people, because they're often eating half of that.

Fiber. Fiber is the piece almost everyone forgets. The general target for women is around 25 grams per day, and through perimenopause and menopause it's worth pushing toward 25 to 30. Fiber supports healthy estrogen metabolism through the gut, and one study of over 2,400 peri- and postmenopausal women found that those eating at least 25 grams a day had a 20 percent lower risk of moderate to severe hot flashes. Most women eat well under 20 grams.

Strength training tells your body to build. Protein gives it the material. Fiber keeps the whole system running and helps your hormones do their job. You need all three.

Think about it as a responsibility to yourself. As women, we are constantly worrying about others and leave ourselves last. It's our time to give zero fu*ks and take those 30-60 min to lift weights. A great place to start is the podcast Happy Smiling People, “Everything You Need To Know About Women's Fitness & Physiology” with Dr. Stacy Sims on building a sustainable fitness routine, how much protein women really need, and why lifting is non-negotiable.

I don't take my body as a given, I am building the strength today to keep carrying my baby girl in my arms whenever she asks me to, to play with my grandchildren if she chooses to have them, and to keep traveling and discovering the world long into my retirement.

Strength is a skill, and like any skill it rewards the people who stay consistent. Start light, think what routine fits best into your day to day, learn the movements, add a little over time. Take a day in between to recover. Feed it with protein and fiber.

Give your future self a body built slowly and on purpose, so that when the hormonal ground shifts, you're standing on something you constructed years before. If you want to learn more, I recommend reading “Next Level” by Stacy Sims, where she explains that women need to train and fuel according to our female physiology.

This is my personal story and what the research shows, not individual medical advice. If you live with a chronic condition, work with a professional willing to help you build strength safely.